On Monday, October 16th at 39 weeks and 1 day pregnant I woke up after my usual restless night of sleep feeling exhausted and achey. My Braxton Hicks contractions had picked up over the last several weeks so the increase of those on this particular day wasn’t alarming but what did throw me off was the fact that during this night they had actually woken me up. I chalked it up to the fact that, over the weekend, we were very busy with nesting projects and I was likely not as hydrated or well rested as I could have been so I didn’t think much of it. Starting the week before, I had also had random moments of what felt like very light menstrual cramps but they never lasted more than an hour or so. Today, however, I woke up with these same cramps and they didn’t go away within an hour like they had before. At noon I had a chiropractor appointment and mentioned the cramps I was having as well as the continued increase of Braxton Hicks contractions and explained how even though I was experiencing both they didn’t feel like they were working together – they were just “co-existing”. My chiropractor mentioned this *could* be a sign of early labor but that it didn’t necessarily mean active labor would be happening anytime soon. We continued to talk about some relaxation techniques that would help to determine if this was early labor that would linger or if this was early labor that was going to progress. I went home, got back to work, then around 3 or 4 pm the Braxton Hicks and the cramps began to feel like they were working together…these bad boys were no longer “co-existing”, they were a team and with each Braxton Hicks the lower abdomen cramp would intensify. I called my best friend and my mom in a bit of a panic – I had been completely convinced that as a first time mom I was not having this baby prior to 40 weeks so I felt very unprepared. My mom lovingly reminded me that I was prepared, but I truly believe that, despite all the meal planning, birth classes, nursery prep, etc., no one can adequately prepare you for the minute you realize that this is it and you’re about to meet your baby. Before closing my laptop for the day I told my husband Cale “Hey, just so you know I’m having these weird cramp/contraction things. There’s a chance it could be early labor, but it’s probably not. Just in case it’s real you may want to tie up any loose ends at work though. Also, can you blow up my exercise ball?” Once I finished work I decided I’d put my feet up and relax with some tea and a heating pad and surely these cramps would go away but, just for the heck of it, I decided to keep an eye on how often they were happening too. They were every 4-8 minutes apart. Hmm… that’s more consistent than I was expecting.

That evening I had planned on having a couple of girlfriends over for a girl’s night to paint pumpkins and enjoy some Fall treats. As it got closer to the time of them coming over, I considered cancelling since I wasn’t feeling that great but I decided not to. I was a first time mom for crying out loud – everyone talks about how first time moms have long labors and I didn’t even know if this was the real deal – I needed the distraction. As we starting painting pumpkins, my friend Allison and I were chatting away, coincidentally talking about the births of her 2 sweet babies, all the while my cramps getting just a little bit more intense as time passed. I don’t remember exactly how she asked it but at one point she asked something along the lines of “do you think you’ll be having this baby any time soon?” to which I responded “well…there’s a chance I’m in the stages of early labor right now.” I gave her a recap of my day and she also agreed that these cramps could be an indication of early labor that could progress or it could be something I may experience for a few days. I remember telling Allison all the reasons I didn’t think it was happening that day, a big one being that I hadn’t had any changes to my cervical mucous or any signs that I’d be soon losing my mucous plug, a common sign that the baby could be coming soon. I knew full well that those weren’t sure signs of labor happening soon but again, I was in complete denial that this baby was coming this week. Within minutes of me having said that I got up to use the restroom (around 8:30-8:45pm) and…well…there went my mucous plug. Here we go!

From that point on, it felt like it went from 0-100. I tried to keep painting the little ghosties on my pumpkin, all the while the cramps continuing to intensify. Allison, who happens to be a pelvic floor Physical Therapist, later recalled my moment of panic where I said something to the effect of “I just didn’t think it was going to get this intense this quick”. She started doing hip squeezes on me and I quickly ditched my attempt to paint my silly pumpkin, this was real and I needed to focus. After a while, she suggested that I move into the bathtub and try to labor there. Getting all 5’10 of me in our small little standard tub wasn’t easy or particularly comfortable, but the warm water was nice and I do think it helped move things along. Once the water started to get cold we moved from there to the birth ball that my sweet husband had just blown up and thank goodness he did! While laboring on the ball, it started to get really intense and my memory started to blur. I remember getting really nauseous and holding onto the bottle of peppermint essential oil like my life depended on it while Cale and Allison contacted our Doula and midwife to let them know what was going on. My contractions were a consistent 3 minutes apart and lasting 45-60 seconds. My doula got on the phone with them to ask more questions and then also (tried) to talk to me and listened to a few of my contractions. She apparently liked what she heard because she decided to pack up and come join the party.

While we waited for her to arrive, I continued laboring with the exercise ball, while the nausea continued and got stronger. I did end up getting sick, which while trying to labor is a very unpleasant experience. I moved to the toilet and labored there for a while (umm. OUCH) and by that time, our doula was arriving. She was at our house for maybe an hour, long enough to observe a handful of my contractions, and pretty quickly decided with my midwife that it was time to head to the birth center. Cale and Allison helped get all the last minute things packed up and we were on our way by 1:47am.

During times of transition it’s common for contractions to slow down so I mentally prepared and actually hoped for that to happen since my labor had gotten so intense so quickly but nope, not mine! That was the longest 15 minute drive of my life. When we got to the birth center I waddled my way into the birthing suite I had chosen, stopping a time or 2 to have a contraction on the short walk inside. My midwife asked if I wanted to be checked to which I responded “can I think about it?” and she said “of course”. I knew that this could be a make or break moment for me – the last 5 hours felt HARD and so unbelievably intense. If she told me I was only dilated to 3 or 4 centimeters I knew that I could start second guessing my ability to endure this unmedicated labor. A little while later my curiosity got the better of me and I asked to be checked. While I laid there I was praying “Lord, please just let me be at a 4 or 5.” My midwife said “You’re a 6, stretchy 7”. THANK YOU, JESUS! I was more than halfway done. I could totally do this.

I knew my whole pregnancy that I wanted to labor in the water as much as I could so I chose the birth suite with the biggest birth tub. While they filled it up they had me labor on the toilet again, which is just about the worst torture imaginable 😉 but woah, is it productive! I cannot even put into words the sweet, sweet relief I felt getting into that tub of hot water. It was the biggest tub I’ve ever been in! I had to use my arms to hold my tall self up on the edge because my feet didn’t even touch the other side of it (which funnily enough resulted in bruises on my arms and a very sore upper body the next day). I felt so much relief that at one point I asked my midwife “am I going to stop making progress now? I’m not nearly as uncomfortable as I was before” and she told me “no, you may progress even faster now since your body is able to relax so much more!” Boy, did I. It was probably about 3am when I got in the tub and the next couple of hours were a bit of blur, the detail in the times of events from this point on are thanks to the detailed notes of my birth team that I went back and referenced to write this post.

During my earlier check my midwife had suspected that baby was asynclitic, which means that baby’s head is not in an ideal position for birth. Due to this, my doula instructed me to get into a position that would help encourage baby to move her head (think marriage proposal position with one knee down and one knee up). We waited until I was in between a set of contractions (or so we thought) before I got up to move and as I was repositioning another contraction hit, which caused me to lift myself out of the water and say (more like shout) “Ow! Ow! Ow! NOPE!” I dropped to a weird sit/squat position in the tub and stayed there. Until that point I had been handling the intensity well, breathing through contractions, and keeping low moaning tones but this caught me completely off guard. My headspace was focused on physically moving into the new position and not on handling the contraction so I had a taste of what it was like to lose focus and I didn’t like it. The good thing was based on that reaction they think baby moved her head successfully with that single contraction!

Around 4:15 my doula instructed me to start getting out of the tub to go back and labor on the toilet while they refilled the bath with fresh water. I remember borderline crying while saying “I don’t want to”. She responded “I know you don’t, honey, but it’s really productive and I think you should” to which I said “I know, but I don’t want to”. I labored in there for a short while before I asked Cale “can I be done?” He poked his head out of the bathroom and said “she wants to know if she can be done” they responded “have her do one more”. That was music to my ears! My whole labor I kept repeating to myself “just one contraction at a time. I can handle one contraction.” By 4:40am I was back in my favorite spot, the bath.

A short while later, they suspected I had a cervical lip and wanted me to specifically focus on breathing through my contractions so that it would slip away on its own. It did not. By 5:30am, I decided on getting checked again and I was 9.5 cm dilated during a contraction. At 6am, my midwife asked if I wanted to continue trying to labor my cervical lip away or if I wanted her to try and push it. I had already vocalized that I wanted to be done so I decided to ask her to move it. She was able to successfully move it with the first contraction she attempted it with but unfortunately it slipped right back with the next. By 6:09 they had me out of the tub and on the bed so I could start pushing while my midwife worked on getting this cervical lip moved, which was hands-down the most painful part of this whole labor and delivery. Ring of fire, who? That felt like nothing compared to having that cervical lip moved! I don’t describe any other part of my labor or delivery as “painful” – everything else is just intense and uncomfortable, cervical lips are a whole other ballgame.

At 6:49am I birthed my 8 pound 1 ounce, 20.75 inch baby girl. She came out with so much force we all were shocked and wished it had been caught on video. The sweet, sweet relief was incredible; there’s truly nothing like it. They placed her on me and the first thing I noticed was a lot of dark curly hair, which made me smile because I had such bad heartburn during my pregnancy and I made so many jokes about how much hair she’d have. Within seconds I heard her soft cry and was so overwhelmed with joy. To my surprise I didn’t cry, probably because in the moment I was just so proud of myself, but I think I saw her daddy wipe a tear or two away.

After I delivered the placenta I was laying there in heaven with my baby when I said “uh, I think I just felt a gush”. Within seconds I had given my consent to Pitocin and the hemorrhage was addressed. I’m so thankful for how beautifully the whole thing was handled and I don’t take this experience lightly because I know this can be so scary for some people (and reasonably so). This did result in some later queasiness and lightheadedness but I again am so unbelievably grateful for my amazing birth team who took such amazing care of us. Because of baby girl’s explosive entrance into the world I did get several stitches due to a pretty decent tear, which resulted in a longer postpartum bedrest recommendation than average.

While Cale ate some breakfast, baby girl and I took an herb bath which felt absolutely glorious. I wish I could have frozen this moment and savored it longer. I choke back tears every time I sit and think about it. I prayed for this moment for so long and here it was. I’m living the life I’ve prayed for since I was such a tiny girl. I brushed her hair and just stared at her bright red, round face. I thought my heart was going to explode… if only I knew then how much more that love would be deepened over time.

By 11:15am, we were loaded into the car and on our way home. We were absolutely exhausted and so ready for this nap we were about to take but also couldn’t wait to FaceTime our parents and virtually introduce our baby girl to them. We made the calls and sent our announcement texts to our family and close friends, turned our phones on do not disturb and took the most amazing 4-5 hour nap of our lives.

We were officially a family of 3 and the adventure was just beginning…